Hands off my desk you bastard!

I've recently moved desk in the office. After two years in my old desk (lovingly known as the James Bond desk due to it's number - 5W 007) I decided to move when my secondment ended. The James Bond desk had it's advantages...if I peered carefully I could see the River, the Tower of London and Tower Bridge, and it did have a cool name. However it also had many disadvantages, principally being just off the corridor in an open plan office so everyone could see exactly what I was doing at all times. Not good for the secret forum reader or blogger.

One of our partners (fondly known as licky lips - don't ask) retired at the end of June. He had a prime desk, which I was eyeing up. Prime as it's off the beaten track...it's as isolated as it can be in an open plan office and it's not overlooked. The neighbours are friendly, and have reasonable standards of personal hygiene (a distinct advantage over the old desk). It's also by the window with lots of space for shoe storage. Oh and did I mention it comes with it's own tree for above average oxygen levels to improve productivity....After debating with myself as to what was a suitable period of leaving the desk empty out of respect for it's previous occupier I put in the move request. I moved, unpacked, carefully arranged all my accounting books and made it home.

However it looks like my joyous new location may be short lived. One of our partners (who I will refer to as Weasel from Wind in the Willows due to the physical likeness and his generally weaselish personality)is coverting my desk. He's made various snide passing comments about what would it take to make me move. I've currently been offered two bottles of champagne. I told him where to stick them. Make it a case, a payrise and a promotion and I may reconsider. Otherwise go take a long walk off a short pier.

The thing that really pisses me off is that he could have moved to that desk when Licky Lips left. I estimate that the desk was free for approximately 68 days, 10 hours and 34 seconds (OK I made that up but i was well over two months). He only wanted the desk when I moved in.

So as far as I'm concerned the desk is mine. I've moved in my shoe collection (currently 6 pairs). I've staked my claim. And you Weasel boy can go fuck yourself.